Retrograde Madness...

Ever feel like the universe is working against you? The answer is most likely yes and if not, I want to know your secret. No matter how zen we try to be sometimes it feels like no matter what is going on it can just feel extra difficult. For the last two months we have been experiencing some universal pulls because a couple of our planets have been in retrograde. If you are wondering what a planet being in retrograde means, it is when a planet decides to reverse its direction or simply move backwards. This universal pull messes with our typical flow and can mess with communication, relationships and tons of other important aspects of your day to day. Retrogrades are a concept that I was introduced to my very first month of working as an esthetician. I don’t know why folks in my industry are hyper aware of the shifts in our universe, but we are. I blame the fact that we need a reason for late cancellations, clients forgetting appointments or technology blunders. I admittedly have always been one of those typical retrograde weirdos that try to avoid certain behaviors during these shifts.

This year has been the perfect example of how I can’t quite plan out everything, even during retrogrades. What I’ve learned starts all the way at the beginning of this year when I was planning my wedding and trying to avoid signing a major life document during mercury retrograde. I mistakenly thought retrograde was ending sooner than it was and ended up getting married with two days left of that current cycle. When I found out, I almost cancelled my wedding. I had mini panic attacks to two of my sweetest clients who convinced me to at least sleep on a decision to cancel my wedding day. Luckily, I didn’t cancel and the day was flawless. However I typically don’t schedule anything during these times like a haircut or even an iphone update. This year so far has really pushed me to let go of my tight controlling virgo grip on the unexpected things we face in life and it’s forcing me to face life in a whole new way. Starting with potentially cancelling my wedding because I was 2 days off on my calendar when Mercury was going direct to avoiding an iphone update in New York which left me lost for 30 minutes and avoiding certain conversations led me to say enough is enough. I get it, Mercury, Venus and whatever other planet is in retrograde - I’m tired of working my life around you.

So once I just started to live without fear of a planet’s rotation, then I started to realize how letting go was actually going to start bringing me more peace. Last week I was at the Philadelphia airport after giving a Skin Food Talk at the Free People headquarters and exhausted from a whirlwind east coast trip with my schedule filled up to the second with what I had to do once I got back to LA and an hour before my flight is suppose to board...it gets cancelled. I’ve had flights cancelled before including when I was literally moving from Milwaukee to Austin with a sedated cat in tow. Typical Hayley would probably have had a meltdown about a cancelled flight because I was exhausted and feared the ripple effect of what pushing my schedule back would be. But, I didn’t. I simply got in line and smiled at the customer service associate and said thanks for your help. I got a hotel, slept and headed back to the airport without irritation. I even chatted with a lovely lady at the airport for a long time before we boarded. I can’t explain the shift for me but it began after a manifestation workshop I took with Lacy Phillips of Free + Native. I don’t want to give away too much of her process because you have to experience it yourself, however something she said to me was Virgos tend to manifest more for others than they can for themselves. This shook me to my core because my entire life I’ve thought about others needs before my own. I do other people’s work before I do my own. I say yes to things because it helps someone else out. I’ve had this standard for myself for 3 decades and I am just now letting it go. To be able to manifest my best life, I needed to shift some false programing and beliefs so putting myself first has been one of them.

I stayed partnered with a company that wasn’t fitting for a long time and two weeks ago they reached out to me saying how the partnership wasn’t going to work for them. Their reasoning made so much sense because they were my thoughts too. I was putting the needs of another company before my own and after getting multiple universal signs that it’s time to let go, I literally had to have them break up with me first. I’m the gal that has stayed in relationships longer than I should have because I don’t necessarily know when it’s time to leave and also I can easily lower my standards to accommodate someone’s else's goals. Instead of a boyfriend, I was doing this with a company so it felt really odd yet familiar. As soon as that partnership ended I felt my universal window open wide for the opportunities I never thought possible. I even started to physically feel better and emotionally lighter.

The moral of the story is that sometimes we have to let go of the idea that we can control everything. The universe will keep retrograding (not sure if that’s a word) and your flights will get cancelled. If you put yourself first by honoring yourself and your needs, it won’t matter what else is going on because you will be taken care of. So now that I’m lighter, officially autonomous and in charge of manifesting my heart’s desires we shall see how Therapeutic Skin Coach evolves. I’m grateful for all of you to be reading my blog each week so stay tuned for more coming soon!

Xo - Hayley

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