Consistency might be key, but why do we sometimes drop off?

Last week I got my first facial in well over half a year. Mind you I take great care of my skin but a true facial is rare for me. I felt so incredible afterward that I actually said: “wow, this must be why I’m in business!”. People ask me all the time, how often do you get a facial? And it’s sort of embarrassing that the answer is almost always never. The reason why comes in two parts;

1 -  I don’t work in a spa setting anymore where I am able to get treatments with my coworkers on my downtime.

2 -  I’m really not the best when it comes to consistency with services.

My hair seems to always be a few months out from when I should have gotten it cut, I am a little late on follow-ups with my healers, I don’t get massages nearly as often as I need to, my exercise schedule is never consistent, and most of the time an appointment gets prompted by someone else who is bugging me to book. I’m truly grateful for those prompts and utilize them just as much in my practice because of my own failure to launch when it comes to active consistency. So why do we get stuck? I want to explore a little bit of that today since I’m right there with you and what to do to navigate it all.

A while ago a lightbulb went off when a healer of mine reminded me that adding more onto my plate, regardless of the benefits, crowds my head enough to feel like extra work even if it’s self-care. So a workout, for example, would feel like actual work and stress my whole day out. The key for me is to shift the language around it. I need and like to move so instead of scheduling in a “workout” I make time for movement. My mind was so subconsciously fixated on the connecting term of “work” and “working out” that it took a whole new label for me to accept the difference. This shift helped broaden my perception of how I can honor myself with this necessary part of living. We need to move but it doesn’t have to feel stressful or forced, it can be as simple as deciding to stretch in between clients or going on an after-dinner walk. For someone like me, that mindful approach really caters to my lifestyle much more. I work from a very packed schedule every day that often times just adding one more thing, regardless of how beneficial it is, can send me into a tailspin.

Whenever I meet a new client I encourage them to come back within 4 weeks because of our skin’s regenerative natural cycle. If I can see you twice within the time frame that your skin is turning over, I can better your chances of achieving the results you are seeking. So whenever someone cancels, reschedules, or drops off and then comes back only when an issue arises it brings me back to how I feel when I’m in that situation. I preach consistency yet I’m the first one to fall off the wagon. So in order to support you without feeling hypocritical, I can be pretty lenient in how we navigate your skin’s care. Here are the top 3 scenarios that occur:

Best case scenario:

You prebook and follow up within 4 weeks! This is the ideal because it’s a guarantee that you’ll lock in your appointment time of choice and you don’t have to stress if something comes up with your skin because you know I’ll be there shortly to help assist. Whenever someone can commit to this they truly feel the benefits of their commitment to their skin.

Most common scenario:

You come in and follow my consultation notes to the best of your ability. You feel comfortable with how your skin feels and just want to see how it goes before you commit to another appointment. Whenever this happens people email or texts me with tons of questions and for the most part, I can satisfy their need for an answer. The only negative is that my understanding of your skin is still very limited and so my advice might feel a bit generalized. Therefore the trust in my expertise might be up for question, but ethically, I can only speak to what I know.

My least favorite scenario:

You come in and might not resonate with my process right away. You get my notes but probably don’t follow up with the suggestions completely. And then - you fall off. I email to try to prompt you to come back in but after a while, like a bad date experience, I get the hint and wish you well from afar. Cut to a few months or maybe a year later, you come back with a question about your skin after going to a different service provider or trying some prescriptions and immediately want my advice. It simply can’t work that way. I would love to just blindly give advice but not only is that unethical, it could potentially damage your skin in ways that even I can’t predict.

What it all comes back to is determining your commitment to your skin and the type of consistency are you willing to dedicate to it. My mission is to help you fall in love with your skin and discover how your skincare regimen can become a daily self-loving ritual. This ritual can become the catalyst for change in how you start to view yourself in a more positive light. Once we make that shift, that's when the true skincare magic happens and my monthly services become just a part of that care because you enjoy it, not because you need it.

Start to look at your daily schedule and ask yourself the following questions;

"Am I overwhelmed?" if so, you're probably like me where simplicity is key. And don't worry, we can always find an effective regimen that works for those individuals.

"Am I resistant?" you may realize that you aren't ready to look at your whole self quite yet, and that's also perfectly okay. We can start with what works for you one step at a time.

"Am I ready to do the work?" and depending on your answer, I or your provider of choice, will align with you. Whenever you are open and start to show up for yourself you can find that the changes happen fast. 

I totally understand that it takes time for all these things to align with an individual because our modern culture throws so much at us at once that it's easy to just want to pause. This is your life and you get to be the driver of your experience. If you have to force yourself to fit a mold or follow a certain structure that can be more detrimental than just allowing yourself to flow. I hope this helps some of you who experience this very common occurence. And just know that no one is perfect and though consistency might be key, that also shifts the more you evolve. Continue to honor yourself and know that I hold space for you every step of the way.

Thank you for reading and until next week, take care. 

xo - Hayley

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